Love Lost
by Avoline Malfoy
Summary: *Sequel to An Unlikely Prince Charming* Loki paced, waiting for news on his wife and child. But the news he awaits is not the news he wanted to hear.
1. The Darkest Day

_Disclaimer: I own nothing_

* * *

_You said you wanted a sequel, so I present you one!_

_You are going to hate me._

_This will not be the happy, romantic story that the first one was. No, this will be the worst possible story you could ever imagine. I let that last story go far too smoothly, which is so unlike me. So this one will be one long, bumpy, heart-breaking road._

_Yes, I am evil, and I know it._

_So, let's get the heartbreak started._

_Sit back and grab a box of tissues._

_Love always,_

_Avoline_

* * *

Loki paced outside of the healing room. Meeka had went into labor some hours ago, and something had went wrong. He wanted to be in there, but for once, his title meant nothing. He picked at his hand, the same hand that had first turned blue, his mind compiling the worst scenarios possible.

What if she was dying?

What if the child was dying?

What if they both were already dead?

He sank to the floor, shedding the mindset of king. For that moment, he was the young prince, scared to death and with nowhere to turn. His mother was gone. Odin was there, true, but what would he know of the situation the new king was in. Loki bit his lip, trying to hold back the overwhelming fear.

He couldn't loose her.

He didn't want to loose the child.

"Brother, what bothers you so?"

He glanced up to see Thor, a relieved half-sob passing his lips. For the first time in a long while, he was glad to see the favored prince. Thor would be better than anyone right now. For Odin's sake, they were brothers! Who better to comfort one than one's sibling, adopted or not?

"Thor," he whispered. "Oh, brother, you will never understand how glad I am to see you." The blond took a seat beside him.

"Where is your queen, brother," he inquired. Loki gestured to the set of doors in front of them.

"Labor started swiftly," he answered softly. "Next thing I know, they're taking her in there, and I was forbidden to enter." He let one tear slip from his emerald eyes. "I don't understand. They were both healthy, both doing so well. What could have possibly gone so wrong that I cannot be by her side?"

"It probably out of caution, brother," Thor suggested. "As to why you are not allowed by her side, I cannot answer that. Just know that everything will turn out just fine."

"What is there to be cautionary about," the raven-headed man hissed.

"Keep in mind, brother, she is mortal," the older one reminded. "You are a god. They are most likely just making sure that her body can handle giving birth to the child of a god." Loki let out a bark of laughter.

"She is must stronger than they think," he replied.

"But also much more delicate than you think," Thor countered. The doors opened, and Loki lifted his eyes. "I'll shall leave you now, brother. Find me when you receive the news." He stood, but Loki didn't notice.

"My wife," he began as he stood, once again dropping the demure of king. "Is she well? Is my child well?"

"The child is alive," the young healer, Kissa, responded. "A young prince, my king." He sighed and closed his eyes, relieved that his child was safe.

"And my queen," he questioned, meeting Kissa's gaze. "Is she well? Can I see her?" Kissa shook her head.

"I apologize, my king," she answered softly. "But she did not survive childbirth." He stared, the world falling away.

She was gone.

* * *

Loki stood on the balcony, watching as the sun set behind the mountains. This time, there was no Valhalla sent Valkyrie waiting in his bed. There was no violet-eyed lover ready to hold him close and keep him warm. There was only the bitter cold of the empty sheets. There was only the reminder of what he had, and what was now lost forever.

He sighed and turned around. He would have to face it sooner or later. The quicker he dealt with it, the sooner he could focus on his son. Miekall needed him to be strong.

Meeka had picked out the name. Said it would be a better memorial for her brother. He had argued that they would have a girl.

That argument seemed like forever ago.

He whimpered at the sight. He half expected to wake up in her arms, her belly moving with every kick of their son.

But this was no dream. This was his new reality. This was his worst fear come true, his darkest nightmare come to life. This was everything he had prayed would never happen.

She was gone...

And he was alone.


	2. A Time To Grieve

_Disclaimer: I own nothing_

* * *

_So, our great King Loki is now a widower and a father! How will he deal with raising a child all alone?_

_First, though, how will he deal with his grief?_

_Sit back and find out!_

_Love always,_

_Avoline_

* * *

Loki held Miekall, trying his hardest to calm the newborn. He didn't have time to grieve for Meeka. Someone had to care for the young prince, and since he was the father, he had to do it. Thank Odin, he was patient.

"Loki?"

He turned, wondering if maybe, just maybe, it had all been a bad dream.

Jane stared at him, a look of pity of her face, Thor not far behind. Loki's heart sank as the child in his arms screamed even louder.

"Let me try," Jane insisted, reaching for the baby. Loki relinquished the child, watching, hoping to figure out how to sooth his son. "Hey, Miekall. What's wrong? Are you scared?" The child started to grow quiet as the blond man stood next to the king.

"She's wonderful with the little ones," Thor stated softly. Loki nodded, his mind wandering to Meeka.

"Do you love her," he whispered sadly. He turned and met his older brother's gaze.

"You know I do," the God of Thunder answered.

"Then don't make the mistake I did," the raven-haired man pleaded. "Please, if you truly love her, don't. Don't think that her body can handle it, don't think that it would be okay, just don't." His voice cracked on the last word, tears lining his eyes. The older man placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Have you yet to grieve, brother," he questioned. Loki sighed and averted his gaze to the floor.

"Someone has to care for him," he muttered.

"But how can you care for the young prince when you are barely caring for yourself," the blond pointed out. "Grieve, brother. Jane and I will care for him." The king nodded, slowly making his way to the door. He turned, glancing at the couple as they cooed over his child.

_Meeka would have smiled._

* * *

He wandered through the trees, taking solace in the solitude. It would give him time to think, time to not be King of Asgard. He could just be him, the widowed father who had not a single clue what to do.

He turned to find that he had wandered far from the palace. No one would hear him. No one would find him for a few hours. He sagged against the nearest tree, clamping his eyes against the fresh wave of tears.

Why did she have to die? Why did fate have to take her from him and their son? A broken sound passed his lips as the numerous questions floated through his mind. Was this his true punishment for the chaos he had created eleven years ago? He dropped to his knees, his cloak falling around him like a blanket. She was the love his life, his everything. He had wanted at least two sons with her, maybe more.

He screamed, the pain becoming too much. Tears streamed down his face as the pent-up sorrow was let loose. It wasn't fair. She made him whole, made him want to be a better person. Why was she the one that had to die? Would couldn't fate have taken him instead? Miekall needed his mother. He needed her caring nature, not the frustration Loki had felt these past few hours.

He screamed again. There would never be another woman who made him feel the way she used to. He could never trust anyone else with his heart, or with the job of raising his child. Only Meeka would do. Only his red headed, violet eyed Valkyrie would fix everything.

But she was taken from him.

She was only 32.


	3. Talks With Friends

_Disclaimer: I own nothing_

* * *

_I am SOOOOOOO SORRY for the long wait! Real life got in the way, then my daughter spilled something on my keyboard, and I had to wait until the next day and go buy a new one._

_And I know. I'm a monster._

_Now that Loki has dealt with his grief, can he handle fatherhood alone?_

_Let's find out!_

_Sit back and enjoy!_

_Love always,_

_Avoline_

* * *

Loki awoke to hear Miekall screaming. He drug himself out of bed and reached into the ice chest for the bottle of milk. He used his magic to warm it up a bit as he made his way to the crib.

"What's wrong, son," he questioned softly, scooping the newborn into his arms. "Are you hungry? I cannot blame you for that." He gently placed the bottle near the child's lips, and the boy eagerly suckled on it. "I thought that's what it was. Your Aunt Jane warned me that you would wake up hungry." Miekall made a sound of contentment, and Loki smiled.

Maybe he could do this. Maybe he could be the father Miekall needed. It would be worth all the sleepless nights and hard work. It would make everything alright again.

"The young prince wake you up?"

He turned, his son dozing in his arms, to see Fandrall standing just inside the door. He managed a smile at the warrior.

"Of course," he answered, the blond stepping further into the room. "He was simply hungry." Fandrall chuckled.

"My daughter does the same thing," he mused. "So much like her mother." Loki shared a laughed as he gently set Miekall back in his crib. "I told you we settled on a name, did I not?" He turned and arched an eyebrow.

"No, you did not," he answered, curious and somewhat nervous.

Fandrall was one of the first to comfort him after Meeka's death. He was Loki's most loyal friend, and vowed to help out every so often with the newborn prince.

"Nikka," the sandy-haired man stated. "In honor of your queen." The brunette forced a smile. "It will be well, my friend. Miekall will grow up no different than any of us."

_But his mother is not here..._

* * *

A week had past since Miekall's birth. Loki had grown accustomed to the night time routine, and his body had adjusted to the amount of sleep.

But his heart still ached every morning.

He had tried to convince himself that he was fine; that his heart was healed from the grief. But the ache in his chest every time he awoke was proof that he was wrong. He never realized how much he needed her, or how much of an influence she had on his life. It never occurred to him that she truly was his everything. He could barely function as king without her.

He had to be strong, though. For Miekall. He needed to show his son how to be a man, and how to be a king.

"Brother." He turned, smiling at Thor as the couple made their way through the garden.

It had gotten easier to smile, at least. He could hide the pain behind a mask. He was good at that. He had always hidden his hurt behind a mask of indifference. Now was the time for a different mask.

"Brother, Jane," he greeted, laughing as Jane extracted Miekall from his arms. "How have you been?"

"We have been well, brother," the blond answered. "Jane has been eager to see the prince again."

"Has anything gotten easier," she inquired, meeting his gaze. He nodded.

"I've grown used to the sleepless nights," he replied. She cooed over the child as Thor stood next to Loki. "But not the emptiness in my heart."

"I know it has been hard, brother," the larger man comforted. "But it will all turn out well." The raven-headed man chuckled.

"That's what Fandrall said the other night," he murmured. "He and Sif settled on a name for their daughter. Nikka." Thor smiled.

"She will grow up strong like her mother," he stated simply.

"With her father's heart," Loki added.

_Just like Miekall..._


	4. Milestones

_Disclaimer: I own nothing_

* * *

_So, Loki and Fandrall, best of friends. How helpful will he be to the grieving king?_

_I got plans for Fandrall, trust me. He'll eventually play a huge part in Miekall's life._

_Anyway, we're at the nest chapter. Has Loki's heart really healed, or is he simply trying to deny himself the chance to heal?_

_Sit back and find out!_

_Love always,_

_Avoline_

* * *

Loki smiled as he awoke to hear Miekall cooing in his crib. It had been a month since Meeka's death, and the young prince was growing before his eyes. The child was starting to roll himself over, and would smile every once in a while.

It was getting easier now. The ache was still there, but it wasn't constant anymore. It mostly emerged at night, when he would face the empty bed, or when he would awake to find that he had only been dreaming again. Each milestone Miekall reached, Loki would turn to share with his queen, only to remember that she was gone. He wanted so badly to share it with someone he loved, but the only person he truly wanted was gone.

"Good morning, son," he greeted, turning over and opening his eyes.

His jaw dropped at the sight.

Miekall was sitting up, his little hands gripping the stuffed dolls Jane had brought from Earth. Loki's smile grew and he leapt to his feet and trotted to the crib.

"Miekall, look at you," he breathed. "Oh, Meeka, look at-"

_Meeka's gone._

His face barely fell as his joy was twinged with heartache. How could he have forgotten? Was this how Thor felt after the incident at the Bifrost? He scooped the youngster into his arms.

"Only a month old and you're already doing so much," he murmured. "I doubt Nikka is doing near as well."

"Sitting up on his own?" He glanced up to see Fandrall walking towards him.

Loki mentally kicked himself. He wasn't really going through this alone. Nikka was only six months older than Miekall. Fandrall and himself were going through each milestone together, as friends and fathers.

"Nikka is as well, I assume," he answered. A laugh escaped the blond's throat.

"That's why I'm here," he chuckled. "Sif and I awoke to see her sitting up on her own. Seems at though her and Miekall are linked somehow." Loki shifted his gaze to the infant in his arms.

"He is growing at a much faster rate," the black-headed man mused. "Is it possible?"

"I was hoping you would know," the warrior responded.

_I wish I did..._

* * *

It was later on that day when Odin approached the young king. Loki was trying to encourage little Miekall to stand, but with no luck.

"Start small, son," Odin informed. "Try to get him crawling first. That's what Frigga and I did with both you and Thor." The younger man smiled and lifted his child in his arms.

"I guess I'm just too eager," he explained. "Both he and Fandrall's daughter are learning things at the same rate." Odin nodded.

"She is connected to the young prince, much like Frigga and I were when we were that young," he answered. Loki met his father's eye. "It's rare, but it does happen. Mostly with royal blood. I was puzzled at first when neither you or Thor were connected, but now I understand better. The ones you were connected with had not been born yet." He sighed and shifted his gaze to the infant. "I only wish your queen had been stronger."

_As do I..._


End file.
